Design gone Bad

Sometimes the ole family motto:  "Seemed like a good idea at the time" applies when what happens is sorta yuck.

I wanted to design something different than a hat.  But I like the quickness of accessories so I thought I would design a neck/cowl thingy.  I wanted it to be somewhat stranded but not exactly fair isle.  Because it was stranded I thought it should be reversible so the backside of the stranded work wouldn't catch on things.  I also wanted a southwest flavor and since it was going around the neck - not scratchy.  I started fiddling with the math of gauge, size, yarn and charting to make it all work with 3 repeats of the design.  I came up with this:

Ye ole Chart

The white background of the chart would actually be a black yarn and I was looking for gold, turquoise, red and black.  I chose KnitPicks Gloss DK yarn for it's softness; and I was thinking about submitting it to the Independent Design Program.  Well...I have said before I am not the most technical knitter and figured  I would just duplicate stitch the sun motif (which I didn't), and do a modified intarsia for the deer rather than carry the threads from one deer motif to the next.  This brilliant idea gave me a gazillion ends to weave in.  I am thinking a duplicate stitch for the deer motif and the sun would have been a better choice over all.

Now I generally don't mind weaving in ends, but this was just plain obnoxious.  It also created another problem - showing through the front.

You can see the woven ends showing through the black - yuck!

To use the yarn more efficiently I stripped the back side which made it look way to "Cat in the Hat" for me.  But then I am not a big fan of stripping.

I have just sat on this thing for weeks.  I am at the 3 needle purl bind off, once I finish weaving in the rest of the ends, and I am having the hardest time looking at it.  I can say that it won't be going to the IDP program for consideration. I am so disenchanted with this I don't want to spend the money to buy yarn for test knitters.  I might in a moment of madness buy more yarn for myself and do the whole thing over again doing a duplicate stitch for the deer and sun to see what happens. 

 I will probably post it to Ravelry for the usual $1.99 with a serious "You really don't want to do this because you will regret it sales job" description.  Charging for something kicks in the cognitive dissonance function and psychologically peeps are less likely to be irritated then if you give the pattern away for free - go figure.

The Unicorn Hat

Nana in the background

This hat has been hanging out waiting to go live with Knitpicks Independent Designer Program.  I posted it today at Ravelry  http://www.ravelry.com/ under my Victoria Johnston Designs Store, and it should hit Knitpicks next week.

Yep, it is a little hippie or at least the model pronounced it so, the model being my oldest daughter.

  I am really going to have to improve my photo techniques.  My youngest modeled the last hat so I was using my oldest daughter this time around.  Took me almost 3 weeks to catch up with her to take any kind of pictures at all.  Next time I'm going to just grab the nearest body, jam a hat on their head and start snapping pictures - the OMG and WTF moments should be priceless.  The Rav pattern has pictures of my daughter while the Knitpicks pdf  will have pictures of one of their models wearing the hat (I think they preferred a less earthy look).

As for the pattern, I liked the idea of experimenting with stripping and a large one color motif.  This unfortunately made for more fussy color work, but I like the effect.  One of the best things about knitting hats is if you absolutely hate what you are knitting at least it will be over soon.  I would not like tipping into hate territory early in the process with a huge complex sweater thing.  I know this because it took me 17 years to finish "The Sweater from Hell".  I even tried to pay someone to finish it for me, but nooooo.  I finally made a resolution last year to finish everything that was left undone.   I buckled down and finished it in no time.  Amazing what 17 years of practice can do - didn't seem hard at all and knit up really quickly.  I actually don't mind seaming and even that was enjoyable.  The moral to this story is: yes sometimes it is better to put off till tomorrow what you could be doing today.

Happy knitting

And The Darwin Award Goes To......

For those of you who may have read my Life With Nana Blog, you will know that she had a form of seizure and in my excitement of getting her to the emergency vet I left a pot of boiling chicken on the stove.  Now I can tell you with complete certainty that chicken will not boil for the 2.5 hours you are gone at the vet.  In fact it will create what is called a protein fire and fill your small condo with grey smoke that will rival the famous London Fogs.  This is not, I repeat not a good thing.

I knew the instant I drove up and could smell the acrid flavor of burning metal what I had done.  Opening the door, turning off the stove, taking the pot outside and opening every window and exhaust fan I had was only the beginning.  I even had a nice chat with the fire department who were called by my neighbors when the smoke began to billow out the front door and contaminate the entire neighborhood.  A couple of hours later Nana and I were able to get in the condo and I was especially grateful that I hadn't tried to boil chicken in a Teflon pan.  In spite of my best efforts, both the newt and the cat survived.  The cat who enjoys living under the bed had stayed there and had probably the best air quality available through the ordeal.  The newt is an immortal and is going on 16 years.  Someone told me they only live 4 years, but my oldest daughter got it when she was 10 or 11 years old and is now 27.  She moved out, newt stayed with me and will live forever.

Protein fires are acrid, they spew and embed every wall, carpet, and piece of clothing you own with a vile smell.  It doesn't go away.  Waking up the next morning with a headache and nausea I called the Insurance Co.  "Hi, I left a pot on the stove and it really stinks in here.  Is that Covered?"  Sounds stupid, but it is no laughing matter. The Insurance will cover.   The Fire/Smoke experts came out and issued the opinion that I needed to move out.  "This is the worst protein fire incident I've ever seen."  They brought an air scrubber which has been running every since.  Hey, you have to be special to leave a pot on fire for three hours and not notice.  The soft goods people showed up. These are the people that scoop up all your clothes, bedding, curtains, purses, shoes and stuffed animals and have them laundered, dry cleaned or O-zoned.  They said:  "This is the worst protein fire incident I've ever smelled".  Ah yea.....I've heard that before. 

It is a little weird to know that all of your clothes are being inventoried piece by piece on a computer as they get ready to clean them.  One thong, one moth eaten cashmere sweater, you get the picture. I discovered things I didn't know I had, or forgot I had.  I cleaned out the pockets of the jackets in the hall closet and got 2 pairs of glasses, 3 lipsticks, a couple of dollars, lots of dog and horse cookies and enough spare change to do several loads of laundry.  It just feels odd having someone go through every piece of clothing you own, feels far more intimate than it should - a sort of personality strip search that is forced on you. They will return a small portion of "rush" cleaning and the rest I will get back in 3 weeks.  It took five hours of sorting into different bags labeled wash, dry clean or O-zone to get my soft goods into the back of the truck.  In addition, I have yarn, lots and lots of yarn, roving, hand spun, cones of wool, etc.  All loaded and headed to be O-zoned to remove the contamination.  I have a "rush" order on 7 balls of yarn to be delivered on Thursday.  Why you ask, because it is the yarn that needs to go out to the test knitters for a hat I just submitted to KnitPicks for consideration in their Independent Designer Program.  I even have a project on needles in a plastic project bag that is headed to the O-zone chamber.  I am going to have a heck of an organizational task when it all comes back.

The structural clean up crew will be here on Monday to begin work.  It is one heck of a way to do a pre-winter cleaning.  But when this is done, I will have clean air, clean walls, carpets, floors, clothes, bedding, painted ceilings, clean ducts, and an ongoing sense of gratitude.  It could have been so much worse.

As for my smoke alarm - gosh it doesn't work.  It is the hardwired kind, no batteries required.  That is also on the list of things to change immediately.

As for Nana and her seizure/tremors they continue, but I'm working on that.

Tams, Shopping and Little Sleep (A fiber and doggie post)

No pony ride for me today.  Nana has been up since midnight with a nasty case of diarrhea.  I thought things were going so well, until the mystery of yesterday.  I have no idea what she might have gotten into.  I watch her like a hawk these days.  You wouldn't know she felt bad, she roared around the dog park this morning, attacked my pant leg, ate well but still seems to have a nasty gut, though it seems to be slowing down and the next couple of days will be key.

So, I find myself puttering around at home, having been up since 4:30 this morning and given up on getting any more sleep I cruised the KnitPicks site moving the sample colors in the Palette yarn line around to try and find an adequate replacement for the color Mustard which will be going bye-bye.  Brass Heather looked like a possible replacement at $3 something a skein.  I am still working on solving the problem of a soon to be discontinued color in my Summer Dragonfly Tam.  $56.00 later and several hours (not all staring at the KnitPicks website) my purchase was complete.  Obviously I should not shop while sleep deprived.  All resolve goes down the drain, but I had to have those size 8 interchangeable needles or a current project would never be finished.  The only size 8 I have are 16 inch circulars and they will never hold the approx 175 stitches I plan to pick up and knit, not even if I jammed them on there.  Things are getting a little disorganized around here so the project bag was a must.  By then it was all down hill.  I've been looking at the Knitting Math software for some time and there I was just $14.00 dollars short of free shipping, I mean really, what's a girl to do.  So I bought the software!  Of course there were a few piddling other things, like the magnetic thingies that hold your place on a chart, a finger strand thingy, all very necessary I assure you. 

I also managed to get the next chart done for the winter tam and can begin knitting that while I wait for my order from KnitPicks to arrive.  In the meantime I have posted a big note on my Computer:

  "STEP AWAY FROM THE CREDIT CARD" 

We will see how long that lasts.

Fiber Artist at Work

I apparently have been remarkably mellow the last several months.  Other than the ongoing adventure with Nana that can be found on my other blog - I have had only moments of small irritation, not enough to get all fired up and write about.  Of course now that I think about it there has been a recent knit pattern that I have my panties in a twist about because it is poorly edited, contradicts itself and the designer is not particularly responsive.  Really cute item, but I will never buy from that designer again.

My attention has been directed to my own knit designs.  I submitted a knit pattern to KnitPicks and they accepted it into their Independent Designer Program.  I have two other design ideas in progress, not counting the current project I have on the needles by the designer that will remain nameless and life is pretty well taken up with dog, horse and fiber.  It occurred to me that almost all the designers have blogs or websites and I figured that I already had a blog, in fact two of them.  I thought about creating a third which was just crazy.  I don't keep up with the two I have.  So I thought I would just tweak this one to be more fiber oriented.  Unfortunately, Stitch and Bitch is taken so Tired of Being Nice Sometimes Designs will just have to do.  Heck.....I can stitch and bitch to my heart's content here without having to create anything new.  Who knows, maybe I will get so mellow I will have to change the title to Enjoys Being Nice. Frankly, I wouldn't bet on it.