Be careful of What You Ask For

Sonora, CA  So small they don't even have a travel poster
 

I realize that I haven't posted in some time.  I was caught up in a wild flurry of social engagements and activities.  Okay, it was wild based on my standards - Fiber conferences, workshops, festivals, and a couple of horse shows thrown in for good measure.  I was just thinking that I really needed to get back to this blog when my life took a hard left.

I had been boring my friends with my dream of downsizing, learning to live light.  I had read of a couple who had sold everything and were now "Senior Gypsys" traveling the world. I had dreams of buying a small airstream and faux painting it to look like a vardo wagon.  

Then I decided that I would just have vinyl copies of vintage posters made of every place I traveled and then have them slapped on the side like some old suitcase. 

I think the universe got tired of my waxing poetic and decided to grant my wish, sort of.

I have been spending a lot of time at my Dad's house this last year.  I have seen a decline in memory function and there were a couple of times this last month when I called him in the morning and his speech was a little blurry.  He has had a couple of strokes in the past and I suspect  he is continuing to have some small TIA or stroke activity.  So I am down for a visit on the 11th of this month when he calls to me the next morning that he has been bleeding rectally most of the night.  So one ambulance ride later and then a transfer to a large regional medical center 3 hours away, 11 days in the hospital with some of the worse nursing care I have ever seen (and I've been in a lot of hospitals both for personal and professional reasons), 6 blood transfusions, 5 major tests of the invasive sort, some family drama courtesy of my sister that would rival anything on a Jerry Springer show and I am now trying to figure out a care plan for Dad that will allow him to stay in his home as much as possible.  He was discharged on Thanksgiving Day mostly because he had stopped bleeding and they couldn't figure out where he was bleeding from in the first place.  We had declined the offer to take out his entire bowel, so.....time to go home with no guarantee it wouldn't happen again.  He does have severe diverticuli.

It is clear that he can no longer drive, at least clear to me, but he is still coming to terms with it. The two accidents on his own country driveway in the three weeks before hospitalization dictate that.   He doesn't take his medications correctly, and bills for the first time haven't been paid, and his memory has clearly declined by a healthy notch.  This last piece is typical of elders with a hospitalization and I would expect some improvement over time.  But clearly he needs help.

Up until this last month, he has done well living independently.  Given that I spent the last part of my career assessing exactly these kinds of issues for families I realized it was just a matter of time before living independently wasn't an option - that time has come.  So now my girls and I are slapping a care plan together that will provide Dad with the ability to live in his home for as long as possible.  fortunately Dad took care of the details and I have the Power of Attorney for Health and Finance which will make organizing this easier.

So I am now a bit of gypsy and caregiver.  Yep, the universe sure does have a sense of humor.